A Reel Opinion: Ranking the HALLOWEEN Films

Halloween is nearly upon us, a time for ghosts, goblins, candy, pumpkins, and most especially, horror movies. The papa of them all is John Carpenter’s towering HALLOWEEN from 1978, when the world was introduced to the shape of Michael Myers; the hulking, masked, silent killer with a kitchen knife. The franchise has lurked along for nearly 45 years, enduring several different lines of continuity, reboots, and remakes. With the release of HALLOWEEN ENDS this month, (read Reel Speak’s review HERE), the talk has moved to the best and worst of the 13-film series, which brings us to Reel Speak’s Ranking of the HALLOWEEN Films. 

 

Which are the ones to watch on Halloween Night, and which ones should be avoided? Let’s take a stab at it…

 

 

 

 

13. HALLOWEEN: RESURRECTION (2002)

Scream Queen and horror icon Jamie Lee Curtis is disposed of in the first half-hour to make way for a bunch of nobodies that no one cared about. One of many bizarre decisions in a movie that treated Michael Myers more as a joke than a threat. 

 

 

 

12. HALLOWEEN KILLS (2021)

This heap of nonsense was the second chapter in the new trilogy that ignored all sequels after the 1978 film. Nothing made sense in this, including an entire town (with trained medical professionals), switching to crazed riot-mode in a blink. The film also made a big deal about returning survivors from Michael’s previous attacks, only to slaughter them anyway. Bafflingly bad. 

 

 

 

11. HALLOWEEN ENDS (2022)

The grand finale to the new trilogy that made us sit through six hours before the long-awaited final showdown between Laurie and Michael after 40 years of fear and hate…a showdown that resulted in a whimper and not a bang. In a head-scratching move, ENDS put Michael on the bench for most of the film, and then the final boss fight was just a messy, choppy, un-emotional dud.  

 

 

 

10. HALLOWEEN II (2009)

Rob Zombie’s sequel to his 2007 remake went into the supernatural. Although this was not uncommon for the franchise, in this follow-up it just came off as weird and nonsensical. More like a series of abstract images than an actual story. 

 

 

 

9. HALLOWEEN: THE CURSE OF MICHAEL MYERS (1995)

The sixth overall film in the franchise concludes a trilogy that centered on Jamie Lloyd, Laurie’s daughter, and also dove into the source behind Michael’s immortality. The script was convoluted, the kills were dull, and despite an alternate cut that was released later and earned a cult following…just never makes sense. And sadly, Donald Pleasance, who played Dr. Loomis since 1978, has his final screen appearance here. 

 

 

 

8. HALLOWEEN 5: THE REVENGE OF MICHAEL MYERS (1989)

The first film in the series to get into mystical energies; establishing a psychic link between Michael and his niece Jamie, along with a cult that embraces the masked killer. These two elements were not embraced by fans and didn’t seem to fit into what we loved about Michael: brute strength driven by evil. 

 

7. HALLOWEEN (2018)

The first of the new, modern trilogy that promised the final round between Laurie and Michael. Ignoring all sequels after the 1978 film, this had a promising start with Laurie preparing for war and protecting and her daughter and granddaughter. The buildup was immense, and then fell apart in the last five minutes when we realized the promised end-all bloodbath was just being punted down the road. Deceiving and un-satisfying. 

 

 

 

6. HALLOWEEN III: SEASON OF THE WITCH (1982)

The original idea behind the HALLOWEEN movies was to do a series of films unconnected to each other, which brought us this creeper that does not involve Michael, whose popularity after two films was so immense that SEASON OF THE WITCH suffered from it. But there is still a lot to love here. It’s creepy, its imagery has lasted the test of time, and the concept of controlling or killing people through technology was a tad ahead of its time. 

 

 

 

5. HALLOWEEN: 20 YEARS LATER (1998)

The first HALLOWEEN movie that (sigh), ignored all sequels, and traded off Laurie’s daughter in favor of a teenage son.  Jamie Lee Curtis reprised her role as Laurie for the first time in 17 years, and the addition of her son (Josh Hartnett, in his first film), added some weight. There’s not too much to this one in terms of plot, but as a HALLOWEEN movie it has the right spirit…and it told a final-resolution story quicker and more efficient than the new trilogy did. 

 

 

 

4. HALLOWEEN 4: THE RETURN OF MICHAEL MYERS (1988)

Danielle Harris has her HALLOWEEN debut as Laurie’s daughter and Michael’s niece, and proves herself as one of the most underrated child actors of our time. This is also a simple film, but the scares really work, and it handles the mob mentality of Haddonfield much better than KILLS did. It also has one of the most shocking endings in the entire series. 

 

 

 

3. HALLOWEEN II (1981)

Taking place minutes after the events of the 1978 film, this one always felt like an extended epilogue more than an actual movie, but even with that in mind it works very well. It also introduced the story element of Laurie and Michael being related…a plot thread that the series would hold onto for decades. 

 

2. HALLOWEEN (2007)

When doing a straight-up remake, filmmakers can either go shot-for-shot, or put their own spin on things. Rob Zombie goes for both here, giving Michael a fleshed-out backstory while staying true to the original film. Scout Taylor-Compton steps into the role of Laurie Strode nicely, Tyler Mane (Sabertooth from X-MEN), puts on the mask of Michael, and veteran actor Malcolm McDowell takes the role of Dr. Loomis. It’s a balance of remake and origin story, with brutal horror and surprising emotion. 

 

 

1. HALLOWEEN (1978)

 

The grand-daddy of all slasher films that has yet to be topped by any sequel, remake, or reboot. John Carpenter crafts a masterpiece of tension and fear, while Jamie Lee Curtis re-invents the Scream Queen. From the moment the chilling piano-theme starts, to when the shape of Michael appears, hairs are raised and that feeling of an approaching dread hangs thick in the October air. It has been rightfully credited with launching the slasher genre that dominated most of 1980’s horror and the “final girl” trope that thrillers still latch onto. When the jack-o-lanterns are lit and the leaves fall, this is the film that always comes to mind first. 

REEL SPEAK'S RANKING OF THE HALLOWEEN FILMS

1. HALLOWEEN (1978)
2. HALLOWEEN (2007)
3. HALLOWEEN II
4. HALLOWEEN 4: THE RETURN OF MICHEAL MYERS
5. HALLOWEEN: 20 YEARS LATER
6. HALLOWEEN III: SEASON OF THE WITCH
7. HALLOWEEN (2018)
8. HALLOWEEN 5: THE REVENGE OF MICHAEL MYERS
9. HALLOWEEN: THE CURSE OF MICHAEL MYERS
10. HALLOWEEN II (2009)
11. HALLOWEEN ENDS
12. HALLOWEEN KILLS
13. HALLOWEEN: RESURRECTION

A Reel Review: BLACK ADAM

The films based on the super-characters of DC Comics are now operating on three different lines of continuity. There is the universe THE BATMAN (2022), occupies, the universe JOKER (2019), laughs in, and the universe that launched in 2013 with MAN OF STEEL. The latter line has had its share of hits and misses, ranging from critical flops, bombs, divisiveness, internal strife, and re-do’s, all resulting in the longest train wreck in cinema. This year, DC pins all their hopes on a little-known hero known as BLACK ADAM. 

 

In the occupied city of Kahndaq, archeologist Adrianna (Sarah Shahi), and her son Amon (Bodhi Sabongul), search for a mystical crown they believe will help liberate their people. They wind up awakening Teth-Adam (Dwayne Johnson), a superhero who has been asleep for thousands of years. Adam’s awakening draws the attention of the Justice Society, which includes Dr. Fate (Pierce Brosnan), Hawkman (Aldis Hodge), Cyclone (Quintessa Swindell), and Atom Smasher (Noah Centineo). 

 

Directed by Jaume Collet-Serra (who guided Johnson on JUNGLE CRUISE), BLACK ADAM is a superhero origin story that stuffs in a ton of story and characters. Oddly enough, the plot is very thin, but is overburdened with one thing or another. There’s business with the military-occupied city, the magic crown, a mystical element that provides great power, powers of the gods, and the underworld rising up with their walking dead to take over the world. It’s a messy web of things to remember, and it is never streamlined enough to make sense. 

 

Things get even more messy with the presence of the stupid Justice Society. This foursome is already present in this universe, and we are thrown into their existence quickly and bluntly with zero explanation; it feels like we missed four movies of backstory with these characters that were never made. The film asks us to root for them and have emotion when they fight and fall, but it just isn’t there. They seem to be in the film just to give Adam something to fight (which he does, over and over with repetitive plot beats), and to teach him how to be a hero…which is something that nearly any one of the many characters could have done. The Society could easily be cut out of the film and would not change a thing. 

 

BLACK ADAM is presented by way of endless CGI; there probably isn’t a single shot in the film that doesn’t have a computer-generated effect or enhancement. Most of it looks phony. There’s also a lot of placement of actors’ heads on CGI bodies which just looks bizarre. Action sequences are done on a large scale, and the film does beg to be seen on the biggest screen possible. The battles are over-edited with way too many cuts, and most of it just comes off as noise. BLACK ADAM has a few good laughs and moments, but not many of them. 

 

Acting is okay. Dwayne Johnson puts away his usual charm and plays the part like a statue; stone-cold with zero emotion. Pierce Brosnan is as elegant as ever but it’s hard to believe he understands the endless universe-hopping jargon he has to plow through. Aldis Hodge plays the part of Hawkman (who looks awesome, at least), as an overzealous Dudley-do-right and just comes off as annoying. 

 

The finale of BLACK ADAM is a noisy affair with the underworld and its leader unleashing the walking dead (which seem powerless, as even kids are able to kill them with clubs), capped off with a very cool end-credit cameo (best part of the movie). Overall, BLACK ADAM is super-flawed film with too much crammed in. Long-time readers of DC Comic books may appreciate it more, but no one should be required to do homework before any movie. This is a noisy, bewildering mess, just like any endless trainwreck. 

 

BOTTOM LINE: Fuck it 

 

 

A Reel Review: HALLOWEEN ENDS

The HALLOWEEN franchise, which started way back in 1978, has a long and convoluted history, with several reboots, remakes, and broken lines of continuity. In 2018, director David Gordon Green’s HALLOWEEN ignored all sequels and only followed-up the initial 1978 film, with a promised final showdown between horror icons Laurie Strode and the hulking, kitchen-knife wielding Michael Myers. That final showdown was punted down the road for the shitty HALLOWEEN KILLS (2021), and now it’s off into 2022 for HALLOWEEN ENDS. 

Four years have passed since the events of HALLOWEEN KILLS, and the masked Michael Myers has vanished. Laurie (Jamie Lee Curtis), has settled in normal domestic living with her granddaughter Allyson (Andi Matichak). Allyson falls for Corey (Rohan Campbell), a tortured young man once accused of murder who stumbles upon Michael’s hiding place and becomes his virtual pupil…

Directed by David Gordon Green and penned by four writers (including Danny McBride), ENDS is a film that is less concerned with Michael Myers or Laurie and more with the environment. Over the years, the once quiet town of Haddonfield has become a haven for mean jerks, bullies, crooked doctors, shock jocks, and drunk assholes who stalk women at every turn. All of this pushes Corey to his breaking point, and when he finds Michael, he becomes his avatar and starts doing his own revenge killing. It’s odd and bold, and gives ENDS such an identity that it barely feels like a HALLOWEEN film. Aside from the ending, the story in ENDS feels like it may have been better off as the middle chapter. 

Credit to the director and his writers for breaking the old HALLOWEEN mold, but it results in is an unfun and unscary movie. Michael and his knife and mask don’t appear until after an hour has passed, and the time prior to that is just dull. The film has very little scares for a horror movie (a serious problem), and characters just do things for the sake of moving the overcomplicated plot forward. Characters as a whole are all over the place. When we see Laurie in the first film of this trilogy, she is living in a fortress while Michael is locked away. Here, she is living in a picture-perfect gingerbread house while Michael is on the loose. No sense. Allyson’s romance with Corey comes out of nowhere, and Michael can’t decide if he's a wounded old man or invincible. It’s a complete mess. 

ENDS looks great, has a small amount of gore, and the score is excellent. Tension just isn’t there aside from a very good opening sequence, and the film has just the right amount of nostalgic throwbacks. 

The best part of the film is the acting, as the entire cast is excellent.  Jamie Lee Curtis is tough while grieving, and Andi Matichak matches her well. The real star here is Rohan Campbell, who really stretches his acting muscles. 

After two and half movies, we finally get that big final showdown between Laurie and Michael, and although the location for the big last fight is proper (a kitchen. Ha. Ha.) the battle is too quick, shot in the dark, and sloppily edited…and is not worth the long wait of 40-plus years. When it does end, there is no doubt that this is indeed the wrap for this particular line of continuity, and there isn’t a sense of satisfaction as much as a relief. 

BOTTOM LINE: Fuck it

 

A Reel Review: AMSTERDAM

As Reel Speak stated in his review of Andrew Dominik’s BLONDE (HERE), one of Hollywood’s new favorite toys is the Fairy Tale, where a real-life event or character from history is given an alternate story or ending. Quentin Tarantino did it with great success, Andrew Dominik did it to a lesser success, and up next on deck is celebrated writer and director David O’ Russell and AMSTERDAM; his first film in seven years. 

 

In 1918, WWI veterans and best buddies Dr. Burt (Christian Bale), and Harold (John David Washington), enlist the help of their old friend and Army nurse Valerie (Margot Robbie), to help clear their names when they are accused of murdering the daughter (Taylor Swift), of their former commanding officer. As they race to find the truth, they stumble upon a darker and larger plot…

 

Written and directed by David O’Russell, AMSTERDAM is an alternate take on the Business Plot: a 1933 political conspiracy to overthrow the sitting President…which may or may not have been a farce. AMSTERDAM isn’t too concerned with following the history books, as the plot itself is moved up nearly 20 years, but is instead focused on dancing around it as the characters stumble and bumble around trying to clear their names.

 

If one word could be used to describe the film, it would be chaos. AMSTERDAM races around from location to location, often using extended flashbacks, unraveling the plot and the mess the characters are in layer by layer. Its frantic style makes it difficult to latch onto anything, and tends to get so discombobulated that it is ultimately exhausting.

 

AMSTERDAM however still has a lot to enjoy, with a gorgeous looking movie, stunning 1918 environments, and very good humor. But despite its frantic pacing, it oddly feels every bit of its 134 minutes. 

 

The entire ensemble cast is excellent. Christian Bale is hilarious, and his look and stature (he’s a wounded vet with a crooked back), just eats up the screen. John David Washington and Margot Robbie have great chemistry together, and Taylor Swift is a huge surprise. The rest of the cast is also great; Chris Rock, Anya Taylor-Joy, Zoe Saldana, Mike Meyers, Michael Shannon, Timothy Olyphant, Rami Malek, and Robert DeNiro. 

 

After going all over the map, AMSTERDAM eventually gets into the deep plan to overthrow the U.S. Government, but by that time the audience would be too beat up to really care. There’s a good story at hand here, and quite relevant in today’s times, it’s just too bad that it took such a messy route to get there. 

 

BOTTOM LINE: Rent it 

 

A Reel Preview: The Year in Film 2022 - Episode X

October is arriving in a big way, offering new horror films, a host of Oscar hopefuls, and a long-delayed superhero debut. Here are the notable theatrical releases for the month: 

 

 

AMSTERDAM – Oscar-nominated director David O’Russell (THE FIGHTER, SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK), returns with his first film in seven years…a fictionalized account of a 1933 political conspiracy. The packed cast includes Christian Bale, Margot Robbie, John David Washington, Chris Rock, Anya Taylor-Joy, Zoe Saldana, Mike Meyers, Michael Shannon, Timothy Olyphant, Taylor Swift, Rami Malek, and Robert DeNiro. 

 

 

TAR – Cate Blanchett plays one of the greatest living composers in this drama. It is directed by Oscar-nominated director Todd Fields (IN THE BEDROOM). 

 

 

HALLOWEEN ENDS – The merciful end of the HALLOWEEN franchise in this semi-reboot-sequel trilogy. Jamie Lee Curtis reprises her role as Laurie Strode, facing off against Michael Myers once again. David Gordon Green, who helmed the first two films in this H40 Trilogy, returns to direct. 

 

 

THE GOOD NURSE – In this hospital drama, a series of mysterious patient deaths points the finger at two nurses (Jessica Chastain, Eddie Redmayne). 

 

 

BLACK ADAM – Dwayne Johnson squeezes into the outfit of DC superhero/villain Black Adam, in this adaptation that has been in and out of production for 20 years. Pierce Brosnan co-stars. 

 

 

MY POLICEMAN – Pop-star Harry Styles takes on a lead role about a gay policeman in the 1950’s. 

 

 

TICKET TO PARADISE – In this romantic comedy, two divorced parents (George Clooney, Julia Roberts), travel Indonesia after learning their daughter is planning to marry a man she just met. It is directed by Ol Parker, who brought us MAMMA MIA! HERE WE GO AGAIN in 2018. 

 

 

THE BANSHEES OF INISHERIN – Oscar nominated director Martin McDonagh (THREE BILLBOARDS OUTSIDE EBBING, MISSOURI), brings us this drama in the Irish countryside about two friends (Colin Farrell, Brendan Gleeson), who fall into conflict. Kerry Condon and Barry Keoghan co-star. 

 

PREY FOR THE DEVIL – In this horror flick, a young nun (Jacqueline Byers), learns the skill of exorcisms and battles for the soul of a young girl. 

 

 

TILL – A biographical film about Mamie Till, an activist who pursued justice after the death of her 14-year-old son, who was lynched after whistling at a white woman in 1955 Mississippi. 

 

*

 

Next month, Reel Speak previews the month of November. 

 

 

A Reel Review: BLONDE

When Quentin Tarantino graced us with his magnificent ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD in 2019, he unknowingly may have started a new genre in film: The Hollywood Fairy Tale…where real-life people and happenings are given alternate stories. Tarantino gave his players a bold, yet satisfying and happy ending. Here in 2022, director Andrew Dominik takes the same approach, but sticks with tragedy in his Marilyn Monroe biopic, BLONDE. 

 

Directed by Andrew Dominik and based on the 2000 novel of the same name by Joyce Carol Oates, BLONDE is a semi-fictionalized take on the famed actress. The film takes us through Marilyn Monroe’s rough childhood and her skyrocketing career in film, as she goes through husbands (Adrien Brody, Bobby Cannavale), lovers (Xavier Samuel, Evan Williams), and sex abuse at the hands of studio producers and even Presidents. The film sticks closely to her childhood experiences with her abusive and mentally disturbed mother (Julianne Nicholson), and semi-absentee father…using those old memories as a catalyst for her ongoing miserable life as an international movie star. Dominik strips away much of the glam of Hollywood and presents it as a dangerous place for women at the time, making a statement on what happened then and perhaps what continues to still happen behind closed doors today. 

 

BLONDE pulls no punches in presenting a grim Hollywood, and both Dominik and his star Ana de Arms deserve much credit making such an uncompromising film. Nudity is plenty, the scenarios uncomfortable, and Dominik’s take on abortion is made clear through a heavy-handed or even grotesque manner. This could all be called exploitative, but if the film had shyed away from the assaults to Marilyn’s body and mind, it would have come off as a sanitized film and just another addition to a long list of endless biopics. 

 

Dominik puts together a gorgeous film with breathtaking cinematography. It often looks like it should be playing in 1950’s theatres, and archival photographs of Marilyn are recreated in stunning detail. Scenes are shot artfully and abstractly, and the changing of aspect ratios and switching from black-and-white to color helps to mark the time periods. The score by Nick Cave and Warren Ellis is excellent. 

 

Also excellent is the acting. Ana de Arms vanishes into Marilyn in look and sound, and she plays a woman who is constantly teetering on the edge of breaking down so convincingly that we should perhaps wonder about her health. The rest of the cast is also great; Adrien Brody, Bobby Cannavale, and Julianne Nicholson. Young Lily Fisher, who plays a young Norma Jean, is a revelation. 

 

There’s a lot to debate about BLONDE in just how true it is to history, but as the character actually says in the film, “my life is a fairy tale”, and the film should be viewed as such…and there should be no surprises that it ends tragically. At 166 minutes with a deliberate pace, BLONDE feels like it goes for an eternity, and despite its graphic scenes here and there, is actually a soft NC-17. It’s take on Marilyn may not be what generalized audiences want to see, but perhaps that’s the point Dominik is looking to make: The audience reaction shows how little has actually changed. Maybe that’s brilliant, maybe it’s a little gross…but its fairy tale cinema at its most bold. 

 

BOTTOM LINE: See it