A Reel Review: THE GREEN HORNET

THE GREEN HORNET was never a film with high expectations; no one was looking for it to be a DARK KNIGHT-esque crime drama. It was intended for a 13-year old mind; nothing to be taken seriously packed with toilet humor. With that mission in mind, how did it do? Just fine.

Raised by his stone-hearted father and newspaper editor James Reid (Tom Wilkinson), Britt (Seth Rogen) grows up to a be lazy and playboy-ish good-for-nothing brat. When his father is killed by an (apparent) bee sting, Britt inherits his father’s newspaper while befriending Kato (Jay Chou), a skilled martial-artist with the ability to create cool weapons that go boom. The two accidentally stumble into the crime-fighting business, using Kato’s inventions to create The Green Hornet persona, while blindly foiling the plans of supervillian Chudnofsky (Christoph Waltz).

HORNET suffers from a severe lack of development right away. The first act teaches us that Britt drinks too much, sleeps around, hates his dad, has no idea how to run a newspaper, and likes to hang out with Kato. All this happens in the first TEN minutes of the film. Things are rushed and fly by in a blink of an eye, and other than the constant barrage of juvenile language there is not much to latch on to. Too much time is spent on Rogen’s buffoonery dialogue and not enough on any depth of character or story. HORNET overall feels like a showcase for Rogen’s schtick more than a theater for a justice-seeking hero on a personal journey.

A paper-thin plot does pop up now and then, trying to add some legitimacy to the two heroes stumbling their way into danger. The lack of a substantive plot takes depth away from the villain, which leaves Waltz with nothing to do but shoot people to show how menacing he is. Yawn.

Director Michel Gondry brings very little to the party, but manages to make a lot of noise anyway. The fight scenes are loaded with intrusive MATRIX-like slo-mo, while the bigger action sequences offer very little but ridiculousness and lots of booms.

Seth Rogen is perfectly cast in the lead; all he had to was act like an idiot. Chou’s Kato is probably the most well played; he manages just enough charisma to keep the character interesting. Waltz leaves his Oscar at home in his turn as the villain; doing nothing but being campy and goofy and waste of a villain. Cameron Diaz turns in a typical cute role for herself, but feels wedged into the film and her presence is often a distraction.

HORNET offers lots of bangs and laughs; providing your brain is pea-sized. It’s immature and stupid, and it wants to be for the sake of offering an alternative to the typical superhero film. It’s paper-thin with a lot of flash, but easily forgettable.

BOTTOM LINE: Fuck it